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24 HOURS BEFORE THE MET GALA AND HERE’S WHAT NANNA HAS TO SAY

Dear my beloved guests, stylists, and glam squads,

You officially have 24 hours to get your shit together.

I want you to take a moment to light some sage and wave it around your vision board in counter clock wise motions at least 100 times and envision your most beautiful selves while chanting “Pretty Hurts” by Beyoncé. If you or your glam squad did not prepare a vision board already then I will pray for you.

Whether you wish to manifest something big, like getting a smile out of me, or something small like winning best dressed, it is up to you.

I am so pleased to see so many of you prepping your skin to get your Met Gala glow on point. Remember the paparazzi’s can’t capture your inner beauty so please keep that in mind.

I want to briefly touch upon the importance of your feng shui energy maps since we really need you to harmonize with the Met Gala’s surroundings. Tonight, it is CRUCIAL for you to place your outfits in the south point of your homes in order for the clothes themselves to generate the “fame” shui. It is vital for the front part of the entire outfit to face the north point which magnifies and boosts your careers. That is if you still want one by Tuesday.

If you are reading this sans a hydrating mask on and without a tumeric tea in hand then I suggest we do something about that since we all know how much inflammation thrills me. 

Please get at least 10.5 hours of sleep tonight and don’t forget to read your bibles. And by bibles, I mean Vogue. 

Don’t disappoint me.

ILYSM

Nanna

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Fashion

NANNA’S MET GALA DO’S AND FAUX PAS

Dear my gorgeous guests,

As I currently flip through the Met Gala archives that Grace lovingly put together for me, I realize that there are many do’s and faux pas that I must address before the big day. 

Over the past couple of Met Gala years there have been those who stand out, and those who should go home and change. Now more than ever we need you to take a stance in Fashion. I want you to ask yourselves, and perhaps consult a shaman, guru or Chinese healer: “Who am I in Fashion and what do I want to say about Fashion?” I want to hear this message loud and clear when you hit every pose on that red carpet. Each time the paparazzi camera flashes, I want to feel as if you are shouting from the Himalayan mountains, THIS-IS-FASHUN. Okrrruu!

There is a reason why this year’s Met Gala theme is about “camp”. And if you still think that “camp” means summer camp in the Berkshires then please don’t bother showing up at all.

Unfortunately we are currently living in a time where originality is becoming a bit of a dying habit. I’m not saying originality isn’t still apparent, because it certainly is thanks to all of our hard working designers, but it’s not as common as it used to be in regards to the consumer. The term “basic” is a word I hear thrown around in the intern cubicles far too often and it paralyzes my entire core, but not in a botox-y way, more like in a cardiac arrest way.

We need you to literally be the most of the most, the creme de la creme. I don’t want to see whats in today. Nor do I want to see what will be in tomorrow. I want to see what will be SO new that that the internet breaks because you have started the next fashion chapter. I want you to channel your most outrageous selves. I’m thinking Marie Antoinette on the day she feels glutinous. I’m thinking Elizabeth Taylor maxing out her credit cards on diamonds after she divorces her 6th husband. I’m thinking Iris Apfel after she layers her 100th bangle on her arm. Do you get where I’m going with this? 

I want the lines to be so blurred that in fact, I don’t even want to see a definitive line. I want to see shapes. 

Don’t disappoint me. 

ILYSM

Nanna. 

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Fashion

Nanna’s Met Gala Letter to all the Attendees

Dear my gorgeous guests, 

We are now entering the final week of Met Gala preparations and I expect you to be the best versions of yourselves this coming Monday May 6th, 2019. This year’s theme: “Fashion: Notes on Camp” based on Susan Sontag’s text is about the exaggeration of one’s self. For those of my fashionista’s who still don’t understand what camp means, I want you to imagine a woman walking around in a dress made of four billion feathers going to her local bodega to buy a pack of gum. It’s an exaggerated fantasy that I want you to transform into. “The whole point of Camp is to dethrone the serious. Camp is playful, anti-serious.” but don’t come looking like a joke.

This week I want you to only focus on outer beauty. The paparazzi’s can’t capture your inner beauty so please keep that in mind. I want you to call your dermatologists, cosmetologists, hair stylists, masseuses, life coaches, personal trainers, chefs, and therapists to make sure you see them at least 3 times each this week. If you happen to have room for them to live at your homes, that would be preferable. Another suggestion would be to consult your make up artists every day until next Monday on what looks you’re going for this year. Please ask them to sleep with a picture of your faces next to their bed so that they can manifest only the best versions of you. 

Do not, I repeat do not, get any fake tans, fillers, or lip injections this week, you’re too late if you haven’t done so already. These things take time to heal and process and I don’t want to see any wtf happened to her face on the red carpet this year. Please spare me the gasp. 

I want you to surprise me, shock me, and make me believe you should be invited next year. I don’t want you to take this theme to the next level, I want you to take this theme to the next 10 levels after that. 

Remember, the entire world will be watching you and I will be the ultimate judge on Monday. 

Mark your calendars and stay tuned for my Met Gala Nanna Commentary which will be live on my insta-story!

Don’t let me down. 

ILYSM.

Nanna.

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Fashion

HAVE YOU MET NANNA?

You may recognize her; she’s the woman who invented chic, always has her sunnies on and has never seen a split end in her life because her hair dresser is on call every Friday at 3pm. She is goals.

I know Nanna more than most, and that’s because she’s my fashion nanna. She birthed me in some way and luckily gave me an internship at Vogue in the accessories department when I was just a little fashion toddler. Back in those days they sent a car service for all of my errands which I found to be incredible chic and thoughtful. It was the era of the Balenciaga gladiator wedge and those things were almost impossible to walk in for more than 3 blocks. So luckily I was always in an air conditioned car, sipping my skinny ice latte, and chatting with my driver Ramone who had some real chauffer T.

Nanna is legendary for many reasons but mostly because I think of her as this kind of fashion dinosaur that has been around so many fashion era’s. She tells me stories about sitting in the whispering chairs at Bergdorfs while having Jardin Bleu tea and firing waiters for not serving her on the correct side. Which personally I don’t blame her for.

Recently she’s been very vocal about the red carpet. Like the actual carpet, like where it’s from and what color rouge it should be. But as you’ve seen on my insta-stories (if you haven’t seen, go on my insta page in the “highlights” section to check it out) she’s been having these amazing recaps and judgments about what people are wearing to the biggest fashion events. She’s right 100% of the time, and people are now comparing these highlights to a better, more modern, more fun, fashion police! Well, At least that’s what my fans say.

Nanna is already preparing for the Met Gala in ways you can’t even imagine. In April and May she gets New York city itself prepped. Like I’m pretty sure she gets uber heli’s to sprinkle some kind of cleanser into the air so that the city itself is ready for the Met Gala. I mean try getting a facial appointment at Mario Badescu in April/May and they’ll literally laugh over the phone, in Russian. I’ve made that mistake once, so now when I do actually want to get a facial I have to fly to Hong Kong.

Because of her super powers, she is able to control everyone who not only goes to the Met Gala but the team behind the guests who are attending the event. For example, she has informed every make up stylist to not over bronze her guests like a particular person that rhymes with Shmelina Shmomez. Sorry I hate to name drop, so rhyming will have to do.

I’m excited to see what everyone will be wearing this year, especially since this year’s theme is a little unclear, but Nanna will be there for you guys reporting live from the event. So make sure you tune into my insta-stories to see some praising and mental breakdowns!

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Fashion

My Fave Haute Couture Spring 2018 Shows

 

Here’s the deal. I love Haute Couture week more than anything in life. I love it more than a sample sale. I love it more than a first class suite on the new Emirates Boeing 777. I love it more than a fresh-out-of-the box BIRKIN.

Watching each haute couture show allows my mind to wander into a place it’s never been to before. I always relate to Alice when she gets to wonderland. Like I am literally Alice.

Witnessing the element of surprise during each show leaves me in total awe and gives me this child-like reaction as if I just saw a magician doing a mind boggling trick.

I continue to develop a deeper appreciation for each designer especially when we get to witness their fantasy side, not just their commercial side.  Haute couture week is about showcasing pure imagination and bringing us all into a different realm of fantasy.

The intricate detail and wow factor each designer brings to the table is what I look forward to the most. What’s really amazing is the idea of keeping the tradition of hand-making a garment in today’s world.  It’s just so special to know that haute couture is all hand-made and that this is fashion’s ONE exception of sticking true to a tradition when fashion is all about pushing the needle forward.

You have to be a true visionary or magician or artist to create this level of high fashion and art. I’m convinced that Karl Lagerfeld is an actual magician. I literally don’t know how he does it, but I do know that Choupette has all the answers.

 

Here is a round up of some of my favorite Haute Couture looks!

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Fashion

Harry and Meghan’s Royal Wedding Guests

 

Oh my god, so what did we think of this extravaganza!? I was totally overwhelmed the entire time and was trying my very hardest not to blink or breathe so that I wouldn’t miss a single second of the most important day of the year. But then it happened, Amal came onto the screen and I literally choked and gasped for air. Is it just me or did the entire world just stop when the Clooneys made their appearance?

Amal Clooney in Stella McCartney was a true vision.  I swear to god that yellow was made for her. I’m sure the color makers in the Pantone lab looked at Amal’s complexion and were like this blend of yellow needs to be on her.  She looked so good, perhaps too good, that you almost would never ever want her at your own wedding because all of the attention would be taken off of you and focus solely on her, you know what I mean? The day before the wedding, I didn’t own one piece of yellow clothing.  Actually I have a Hanky Panky panty that’s bright yellow but that doesn’t count. However I am happy to announce that Net-a-porter just alerted me that they are shipping my entire yellow Spring/Summer wardrobe via Natalie Massanet’s  personal jet which is fab. So thanks Natty, I owe you one!

Let’s talk about Kitty Spencer in Dolce & Gabbana. I’ve actually never heard of Kitty Spencer until the day of the wedding and luckily my British friend gave me the whole lowdown on who she is. I loved everything about this look. Her hat, her veil, the make up, the diamonds, the dress and bag, just worked to perfection. Once I took a closer look at her veil, I texted my milliner immediately and asked if she could make me one in every color before all my summer weddings. I have only about 43 weddings this summer and I want to be the first to pull off this look post Royal Wedding. Also side note, if any one knows who her cosmetologist and dermatologists are please email me right away. I need a little summer refresher and I’m open to new doctors.

Serena Williams in Versace, was a bit controversial on my instagram stories. Some people loved it, some hated it, but I actually really enjoyed seeing this British tea party side to her. She also just looks so happy, fresh and beautiful! I’m so used to seeing her in athleisure and I loved how she was able to pull of such a girly look. Her make up was absolutely flawless and her fascinator fascinated me. If I were to point out one thing that I would have changed was her necklace. It clashed a bit with her neckline and I almost feel like she either needed my grandmothers diamond choker or nothing at all. Right?

Priyanka Chopra in Dior was the best after party look. The asymmetrical drape that’s going on in the front and the back of the dress is something every one is going to ask their seamstress to re create. The perfectly tailored waistline and movement of this dress was cut by a professional and Dior never disappoints.  I also loved her bomb shell blow out, she really knew how to work it and was totally gone with the wind fabulous. I’m taking this photo with me the next time my puppy gets a blowout as a reference photo.

Who were your favorite looks?

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Fashion

“M” is for Met Gala

 

For the record I loathe a themed party. I hate Halloween, Toga parties, Hawaiian Luau’s, let’s all dress in a ridiculous costume and look terrible together party, any themed party, is a NO for me. Having said that, the one and ONLY themed event that is acceptable in my book, is the Met Gala. Why is that? Well, because it is curated by one of the only people I trust with taste, Anna Wintour, and it’s theatrical, inspiring, creative and not tacky. Anna Wintour announces a theme and then all of the designers create looks that are inspired by that theme. The Met Gala unifies the designers under one umbrella having them showcase their talents under Anna’s vision. It’s like a gigantic Parsons project, that you only have one or two months to complete. Then the designers debut their creations on their muses at the Met Gala which is their moment to show how they interpreted the theme. Once they hit the red carpet, we get to  Ooh and Ahh at what the designers came up with. Critiquing is my favorite part of any red carpet, but this one in particular is an absolute favorite because it’s the only time designers get to be really dramatic. And I mean reallydramatic. The one thing I wish the Met Gala did during their dinner was an award ceremony consisting of a variety “best dressed” categories. Since no such thing exists I’ve decided to create three categories of my own: “Best Interpretation of Theme”, “Best Dressed Couple”, and “Most Dramatic”. This years theme was “Heavenly Bodies: Fashion and the Catholic Imagination” so with out further adieu, here are my winners!

Best Interpretation of Theme award goes to Gigi Hadid in Versace. She was a true vision. It was the right amount of creativity showcasing Donatella’s inspiration of stained glass windows commonly seen in churches. Her hair had a 1950’s flip and was bobby pinned on either side, accentuating her truly angelic face. The fit of this dress was tailored to perfection; giving her the perfectly synched waist she deserves to show off. The seams on this dress created youthful lines that scattered along her body. I loved the asymmetrical top and the styling of this look; leaving her elegant collar bones bare of jewelry which gave the dress a moment of it’s own.

Best Dressed Couple award goes to Cardi B and Jeremy Scott in Moschino. The heavy amount of adornment on their outfits gave my eyes a purpose to see. My mouth hit my martini as I watched this sparkly duo arrive. As they took each step, blinding us with their embellished outfits, they truly made a crowning fashion statement. Speaking of crowning, I want to wear this exact outfit when I’m giving birth…not sure which PR team I need to reach out to in order to make that happen, but it will happen. Jeremy Scott hit the nail on the head with this year’s theme making them each look as if they were royalty.  She looked like the queen of the evening, didn’t she? I love the matching creme tones and burgundy stones that picked up very “Cathedral-like” hues. I love the contrast of this dress; giving her a structured and heavily stoned gown, with a soft and drapey overlay of satin that framed her belly perfectly.  Jeremy knows what he’s doing, always. I also just wanted to give a special thank you for reposting my interpretation of one my favorite fashion moments.

Most Dramatic award goes to Blake Lively in Versace. Any gown that takes up 30+ stairs as you walk up, is dramatic in my book. She looked absolutely gorgeous in this burgundy gown. I love the structured top and light weight under dress mixed with the layers upon layers of embellished satin. The drapery and the movement of this dress flowed so perfectly and made such a statement on the red carpet. She has a certain grace and is always so elegant. No matter what red carpet or fashion event, Blake Lively is the essence of Hollywood glamor.

Who were your faves?

xoxo

 

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Fashion

My Fashion Spirit Animal: AdR

 

What I live for the most during fashion month aren’t the shows themselves but the atmosphere that surrounds the show. Of course I love nothing more than a good runway, I mean, I live for the runway, but recently I’ve been more inspired by seeing what people are wearing to the shows. I guess you can say that the streets themselves are a form of a runway and the people who roam it know how to prepare to be photographed in their perfectly styled outfits.  As we all see on our favorite bloggers insta-stories they are all going to the same shows, have similar racks of clothing from the designated designers, yet they each style themselves so uniquely, and that’s what I find to be absolutely brilliant.

God bless the street style photographers who stand outside in rain or shine or blizzard tundra to capture the perfect image of these godly fashion creatures. It’s really due to them that we get to see and discover what fashion month is all about through a totally different lens.

My number one favorite street style star is Anna Dello Russo. I’m pretty sure she’s the reason why “street style” has become such a thing during fashion week. Did she invent it? Probably.

I literally live for her insanely bold outfits and how she can pull everything off as if she created the clothes for herself.

Think about it for a second. She pairs a parka with a fully sequined jump suit and black stiletto heels. Genius, no? I would never think to do that, but now that’s all I want to wear this summer. I’m convinced Anna Dello Russo is a fashion alien and I want to be a part of her tribe. Her ability to be fearless is what created my obsession with her to begin with. She is a true visionary and wins best street style every single fashion month.

xoxo

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Fashion

The Drawn Evolution of Giovanna Battaglia

 

I’m not one to look back. Mainly because I can’t bare to relive the idea that at some point I had bangs and wore turquoise eye shadow sophomore year of college. How did I have friends with such a look and why didn’t my mother tell me I looked absolutely ridiculous? I guess in my defense, I was obsessed with M.I.A and this look was super in during the New York Indie/Hipster/Why are we dressed in $1 thrift store t-shirt movement, and that was the thing to do back then, in 2010.

On one lazy afternoon as I was working on my tan and sipping on my 3rd Aperol spritz, I was scrolling through past posts of mine on instagram. Totally obsessing over myself yet analyzing every little thing that I’ve done. Scrolling back to 2014 when Sew Sketchy’s instagram launched, I was shocked, SHOCKED, to see the evolution of my drawings. Seeing your own progress in something whether it’s about your fitness journey or the stages of your bangs growing back into a suitable length, is pretty amazing and incredibly entertaining.

 

Giovanna Battaglia has been a part of this evolution and has played such a big roll in my daily dose of inspiration. I’ve never met her personally but I’d like to think we’re best friends. I got the chance to work with her on her gorgeous T shirt collection which validated all the years that I’ve spent drawing her. I’ve had an infatuation with her ever since I could remember. Between all the leopard prints, sequined looks, and her perfect chignon, I mean helllurr, she is ultimately goals.

For entertainment purposes ONLY, because that’s what we do here, I’ve put in order the first drawing I ever did of her all the way to the most current.

 

Giovanna Battaglia is my spirit animal

(First ever drawn) October 4, 2014

 

Giovanna wins best dressed in my book

November 4, 2014

 

You really need to look at your texts because I told you I was going to be wearing this look today

December 5 , 2015

 

Striping a pose

April 12, 2016

 

This is what I call fashion people!

August 5, 2016

 

On Wednesday’s we wear pink

September 28, 2016

 

Gurrrrrl, I’m telling you the uber says it’s this way

November, 2016

 

I’m a mess, you’re a mess, we’re a hot mess

January 17, 2017

 

And people wonder how we stay so thin

June 22, 2017

 

To be tired of leopard, is to be tired of life

September 11, 2017

 

This is how you fashion week

October 5, 2017

 

Last nights Christmas look was inspired by the nutcracker going to fashion week

December 27, 2017

 

My favorite color is shopping

November 27, 2017

 

My shaman told me to add a lesson to this story. And the lesson here is, don’t cut your own hair, and keep doing whatever it is you’re doing because you will never know the hustle until you stop and smell the roses once in a while.

Namaste.

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Fashion

If you want to conquer fear

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