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HAVE YOU MET NANNA?

ANNA WINTOUR

You may recognize her; she’s the woman who invented chic, always has her sunnies on and has never seen a split end in her life because her hair dresser is on call every Friday at 3pm. She is goals.

I know Nanna more than most, and that’s because she’s my fashion nanna. She birthed me in some way and luckily gave me an internship at Vogue in the accessories department when I was just a little fashion toddler. Back in those days they sent a car service for all of my errands which I found to be incredible chic and thoughtful. It was the era of the Balenciaga gladiator wedge and those things were almost impossible to walk in for more than 3 blocks. So luckily I was always in an air conditioned car, sipping my skinny ice latte, and chatting with my driver Ramone who had some real chauffer T.

Nanna is legendary for many reasons but mostly because I think of her as this kind of fashion dinosaur that has been around so many fashion era’s. She tells me stories about sitting in the whispering chairs at Bergdorfs while having Jardin Bleu tea and firing waiters for not serving her on the correct side. Which personally I don’t blame her for.

Recently she’s been very vocal about the red carpet. Like the actual carpet, like where it’s from and what color rouge it should be. But as you’ve seen on my insta-stories (if you haven’t seen, go on my insta page in the “highlights” section to check it out) she’s been having these amazing recaps and judgments about what people are wearing to the biggest fashion events. She’s right 100% of the time, and people are now comparing these highlights to a better, more modern, more fun, fashion police! Well, At least that’s what my fans say.

Nanna is already preparing for the Met Gala in ways you can’t even imagine. In April and May she gets New York city itself prepped. Like I’m pretty sure she gets uber heli’s to sprinkle some kind of cleanser into the air so that the city itself is ready for the Met Gala. I mean try getting a facial appointment at Mario Badescu in April/May and they’ll literally laugh over the phone, in Russian. I’ve made that mistake once, so now when I do actually want to get a facial I have to fly to Hong Kong.

Because of her super powers, she is able to control everyone who not only goes to the Met Gala but the team behind the guests who are attending the event. For example, she has informed every make up stylist to not over bronze her guests like a particular person that rhymes with Shmelina Shmomez. Sorry I hate to name drop, so rhyming will have to do.

I’m excited to see what everyone will be wearing this year, especially since this year’s theme is a little unclear, but Nanna will be there for you guys reporting live from the event. So make sure you tune into my insta-stories to see some praising and mental breakdowns!

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